vrijdag 28 februari 2014


it is 

My SECOND new hip
Is doing GREAT
and I am so glad 
I can focus now on 

All I was HOPING for
after the firtst new hip
Is happening now
After the SECOND .

I can see the future
Bright and promissing
Complete in balance now
On two new hips 

A miracle
I am so greatful 


maandag 10 februari 2014



I changed my mind
I was not going to tell you all
to share with you 
about my SECOND operation ,
untill afterwards.
When all would be behind.

Tomorrow ... February 11
I will receive MY SECOND NEW HIP 
The other hip was also very bad
and I still was in a lot of pain
with that one.

my new hip is a true miracle
No more pain and
 recovering wonderful

The difference
could not be bigger
My one part is now better than a long time
and my other part is still in pain .

before I dared to say that
to admit that
 took me a while 

When I went back to the hospital
for my check-up
I was grateful and happy 
and I was afraid and sad.

My orthopedist
understood immediately
what was going on .
The pictures confirmed
my story .

Let's do the other one too
he sad .
I was relieved
sad at the same time.

because when the second one
 was going to be
as wonderful as the first 
than all my misery
would be solved

because I hoped I was done
and now I had to do all once more.
all over again.

Why did I had so much trouble
sharing all of this ?
I guess It felt like
I disappointed every-one.

Every-one was so happy for me
and glad for me 
and focussed on my recovery
I supposed
that was what every-one
wanted to hear .

I was afraid
to admit the truth.
I was afraid
If I would share it
it became real
and I could not handle that yet.
for myself.

The first operation was already
such a big step for me 

A lot happened since than
with me
as a person 

The balance
 was far away
my one half was reborn 
and able to focus on the future
and my other half 
was still old and used up 
and reminding me of the past .

old and new 
next to each other 
in me

I intended 
not to share 
any of this
tell all about it
when the second operation would be done

and now
I changed my mind
and that is a big step for me
and I realise now
how happy that makes me 
How I have changed allready
and how I am not afraid anymore
about life as it is .

on the way I had become 
a scared human being
and I adjusted
to make sure 
as little as possible
could go wrong and hurt me
so I lived very safely
I made sure not much could 
hurt me anymore 
so I shared only what was safe .

I learned SO MUCH in the last months
and I finally let go
all of my fears 

and I realised
how I can share 
what's happening
and what's going to happen
with you
is how it is.

I am here 
in the present 
to the big day tomorrow
or better said
to my new life after that.....

Oh boy
there will be so many
to come

I hope you forgive me
for sharing this
so late in the process